


Day #2 - 3AM

by Accal1a



Series: October Nickels Insanity (2019) [2]
Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux, Sidewinder Series - Abigail Roux
Genre: Coma, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, M/M, Serious Injuries, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-22 09:34:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20872031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Accal1a/pseuds/Accal1a
Summary: Kelly sits beside Nick's bedside, holding vigil until he wakes.





	Day #2 - 3AM

**Author's Note:**

> I blame [astudyinfic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/astudyinfic). Go read _her_ October insanity [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20849234/chapters/49560635).
> 
> [mindfluff](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mindfluff) decided to join in on the madness too. Their fics start [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20853593#work_endnotes).

Kelly wasn't sure what had woken him this time. It could have been any number of things, the hospital wasn't exactly a quiet place. 

He looked up from where he'd fallen asleep against Nick's hand, his back protesting as he straightened.

Nick was lying still. So still that were it not for the beeping of the machine, Kelly would be hurriedly checking his vitals. He actually _had_ been doing that, surreptitiously after the last time a haggard looking nurse had given him a dirty look. He wanted to explain that he wasn't doing it to second guess their work, but to assuage his own guilt about not being there when the wound happened, when he'd nearly lost Nick in a street so far away, when he'd nearly lost him without being able to say goodbye…but he couldn't get the words out, they choked and died in his throat, like the blood he knew must have bubbled up in Nick's.

"You've got to wake up, Nicko." Kelly said, and he was surprised to find that his voice was hoarse. When was the last time he'd said anything to anyone? When was the last time he'd drank anything? When did he last eat? He had no idea, such things seemed trivial. He vaguely remembered Owen bringing him a sandwich at some point, but he had no idea what day that was. Had that been this afternoon? He didn't know. All the days were blurring into one. He could feel stubble growing, had to have been at least two days, but time had no meaning anymore. It was just before Nick was hurt and after. Everything else was for naught.

"Please. You've got to wake up. I can't…" He swallowed, surprised he was near tears, but unsurprised all at once. His heart was lying broken in a hospital bed, and there was nothing he could do to fix it. His very soul was battered and bruised and he all he could do was wait. It was pure torture.

"_Please_, Nicko. Please come back to me. _Fuck_ you don't deserve this. You don't deserve to be fighting for your life like this. You don't…God why I wasn't I there? I've always…Nicko you've never been hurt when I wasn't there to patch you up. You're not...that's what a medic is supposed to do, and I wasn't fucking there."

Kelly felt the fingers on Nick's hand twitch and he looked down quickly and then back up at Nick's face, the palour of his skin worrying him just as much as the rest of the wounds. He idly wondered if Nick had had enough blood to replace what he'd lost. He assumed so, but he wasn't sure. Leaning across without letting go of Nick's hand he snagged his chart from the end of the bed, reading it over. Apparently he had, and apparently he was improving, though he couldn't see any evidence of that yet.

The machine skipped a bleep and Kelly looked at Nick, clutching his hand. No. No this couldn't be happening. No. 

"Nick, please. Don't. Don't leave me here alone." 

The machine stuttered again and Kelly felt tears welling up behind his eyes, but he was determined not to cry, determined that if this was the end he would look at Nick with clear vision, look at him as he said goodbye.

He remembered somewhat desperately that most deaths in hospitals occur between 0300 and 0400, and as if to mock him, he saw the clock in the room click over to within that hour.

"Please don't take him back, Eli. I still need him. _Please._"

Kelly felt his own heart stop when there was a long pause between beeps, but there wasn't the scream of machines that would accompany a flatline, he had to hold on to that. After a second, Nick's heart lurched back into a regular rhythm.

Kelly put his head on Nick's hand and sobbed. "Thank you."

**Author's Note:**

> Come and visit the [Cut & Run Discord Server](https://discord.gg/vvy6c76) and join us as we discuss/scream about this awesome series.


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